Speed Reads

a sticky situation

Canadian police catch crime syndicate with $30,000 worth of stolen Nutella

Canadian police in York, Toronto, caught a crime syndicate in possession of $30,000 worth of stolen Nutella, the chocolate-hazelnut spread delicious enough to lure anyone into a life of crime.

Headed by the "King of Car Thieves," the gang was under investigation for its vehicle thefts, but the bust revealed these criminals diversified their stealing habits. "If there was a profit to be made by this group," said Det.-Sgt. Paul LaSalle, they "would jump on the opportunity." Along with the swiped Nutella, officers also found stolen weapons, e-cigarettes, alcohol, and car parts. Most of the 60 stolen vehicles that were recovered were high-end luxury cars made by companies like Lamborghini and Maserati.

More importantly, the Nutella truckload comes out to about about 4,285 jars, assuming Amazon's price of about $7 per jar. If the King of Car Thieves consumed a single serving of Nutella every day — there are 20 servings per jar — this haul would have supplied him for 234 years. I mean, he was obviously going to keep it for personal use, right?