President Trump's Justice Department is preparing to take on universities for discrimination — against white people, according to a report Tuesday in The New York Times. On Wednesday's Jimmy Kimmel Live, Kimmel suggested that the new policy means embattled Attorney General Jeff Sessions is trying to get back on Trump's good side, then he turned to sarcasm, and a special guest. "They're taking action against affirmative action, and I say it's about time we crack down getting minorities into college," he said. "I mean, this has been going on for too long. And I'm not alone."
That was the introduction to a special message from actor and comedian David Alan Grier. "Won't you join me and Attorney General Jeff Sessions in helping to end years of unjust and immoral discrimination against white people?" Grier deadpanned. "Let's look at the facts: It all started back in the 1700s, when black people took all the seats in the slave ships for themselves." He went on in this vein for a while, keeping a straight face, then brought it back to Washington: "It's so bad that white people had no choice but to create their own all-white government, and they can't get a damn thing done. It's time for a change. It's time to give white people a chance. Call Washington — Denzel Washington — tell him it's time to end the discrimination that has kept our white brothers and sisters down for so long."
On Wednesday's Daily Show, Trevor Noah was similarly impressed with the prospective new policy. "Finally! You know how many times I go to colleges in America and say 'Hey, where's all the white people?'" he asked, rhetorically, before making a Game of Thrones joke: "If American colleges were any whiter, Jon Snow would build a wall to protect us from them." But apparently this is a thing, Noah said, citing a poll that shows 54 percent of Trump supporters believe white people face more discrimination than black people.
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"It's almost like when rich people complain about their financial problems," Noah said, breaking into his rich-person voice: "Do you know how high the taxes on my summer home are?" He then brought out correspondents Roy Wood Jr. and Jordan Klepper for a slightly uncomfortable point-counterpoint segment. Like Grier, Wood started out agreeing with Sessions. Watch below. Peter Weber
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