Speed Reads

the mayor of swamptown

Scott Pruitt reportedly has his staffers 'regularly' fetch him snacks

You work up an appetite having your security detail drive you to and from the Ritz Carlton for $58 moisturizer, so it makes sense that Environmental Protection Agency head Scott Pruitt regularly has staffers fetch him afternoon snacks.

They aren't bringing him back Twinkies and Doritos, though, four people with knowledge of the matter told The Daily Beast. He often requests gourmet goodies from Dean & Deluca, and he's also a fan of Greek yogurt and protein bars. "I can't tell you how many times I was sent out to get protein bars on the orders of [Pruitt]," one person told The Daily Beast. When it comes to coffee, he requests that aides brew him pour-over coffee, none of that Keurig stuff that people who fly in coach drink. One person said Pruitt "regularly" sent staffers out for snacks, while the other described it as "frequently."

Pruitt is juggling multiple controversies, including his inappropriate ordering of underlings to run his errands; renting a room from a lobbyist for dirt cheap; having a former top aide try to get him a used mattress from the Trump International Hotel in Washington and figure out how his wife could open a Chick-fil-A franchise; flying first class only due to threats that have never been proven; and the aforementioned being driven around by his security detail trying to track down pricey moisturizer. The question now is this — is Pruitt capable of doing anything for himself? Is there a staffer who goes home with him to tie his shoes? Does he chew his own food? Brush his own teeth? Please, Mr. Pruitt, order one of your staffers to fill us in.