"In response to a surge of migrants coming into this country, today [President] Trump unveiled a new approach that treats asylum-seekers fairly and humanely," Stephen Colbert said on Monday's Late Show. "April Fools!" Actually, "Trump threatened to shut the Mexico border — just in time for Spring Break," he said. "Hey, college kids, I know you had your hearts set on Cancún, but how about Spring Break Wall!'"

"Trump announced his threat in an epic, three-part policy tweet," Colbert said, and he had to take two water breaks while reading them. Then he explained why closing the border would be bad, threatening 5 million American jobs, for example — and America's entire avocado supply. "Holy lack-of-guacamole," Colbert said. "What are we supposed to put on our toast now? Jelly? You go to Concord Grape hell, old man."

"Officials are claiming that the United States will run out of avocados within three weeks if President Trump closes the U.S.-Mexico border, which is bad," Seth Meyers agreed on Late Night. "But I think it's way more disconcerting that everything has to be explained to the public in avocados. 'There will be a trade war! Families will be torn apart! Our national reputation will be damaged!' 'Uh huh.' 'No guacamole!' 'What!?! Impeach!'"

Frustratingly, Trump's policies are just making the border crisis worse, Trevor Noah said at The Daily Show. Cutting aid to Honduras, El Salvador, and Guatemala — the three "Mexican countries," as Fox News put it — will only drive more migrants to America, he said. But "don't worry, the president already has a solution for that: He's going to slap a 'closed' sign at the bottom of America."

Shutting down the border "wouldn't just hurt the hombres down south," Noah said, pointing to the avocado shortage. "Once again, Donald Trump has shown there's no problem he can't make twice as bad. Because you realize if white people can't get avocados in America, they're going to start fleeing to Mexico, and now there's going to be a crisis on both sides of the border." Watch below. Peter Weber

Could Bill Hader have a Julia Louis-Dreyfus-style Emmys winning streak ahead of him?

Hader picked up the Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series Emmy Sunday for the second year in a row for his acclaimed performance on HBO's Barry. He was widely considered the clear front-runner in the category and beat out actors including The Kominsky Method's Michael Douglas and The Good Place's Ted Danson.

In his acceptance speech, Hader thanked co-creator Alec Berg, saying, "I don't know where I'd be without you."

Other actors who have won in this category twice in a row in recent years include Transparent's Jeffrey Tambor, The Big Bang Theory's Jim Parsons, and 30 Rock's Alec Baldwin. Prior to Hader's repeat win, Alex Borstein, who won the supporting actress in a comedy award for The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, also won her second consecutive Emmy Sunday. Brendan Morrow

Fleabag creator and star Phoebe Waller-Bridge won the Emmy for Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series on Sunday night, and immediately cracked a few jokes onstage.

"I find writing really, really hard and really painful, and I'd like to say, honestly from the bottom of my heart, this the reason why I do it is this," she said, as she stared at her award. "So it's all made it really worth it, guys." After thanking her Fleabag colleagues, Waller-Bridge shared that it's "just really wonderful to know and reassuring that a dirty, pervy, messed-up woman can make it to the Emmys." Catherine Garcia

Alex Borstein is having a marvelous night at the Emmys, as she just scored her second straight supporting actress win.

Borstein took home the Emmy Sunday for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series for her role on The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, previously winning the same award in 2018.

In her speech, Borstein thanked the cast and crew of Mrs. Maisel, including creator Amy Sherman-Palladino, as well as her grandmother, a Holocaust survivor.

Borstein joins the ranks of Betty White, Kate McKinnon, and Julie Bowen, who have all won this award at least two times. Brendan Morrow

Tony Shalhoub just won a primetime Emmy for the first time in more than a decade.

Shalhoub took home the Emmy Sunday for Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series for his role on Amazon's The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, beating out nominees like Barry's Henry Winkler, who won last year.

"It takes a village," Shalhoub said while thanking the crew behind Mrs. Maisel.

This is Shalhoub's first time scoring Emmy gold since he won Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series for Monk in 2006. He also won the same award for Monk in 2003 and 2005, making this Shalhoub's fourth Emmy win. He was nominated for Mrs. Maisel in 2018.

It's not Shalhoub's first time receiving awards recognition for Mrs. Maisel, though; he won the Screen Actors Guild Award for Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Comedy Series earlier this year. Brendan Morrow

Rep. Adam Schiff (D-Calif.), the chair of the House Intelligence Committee, seemed to have one foot on the impeachment trail Sunday during an appearance on CNN's State of the Union.

Schiff told host Jake Tapper that, although he's been reluctant to support impeachment measures against President Trump, the latest news out of the Oval Office might be changing his mind. Schiff said that if Trump did actually threaten to withhold military aid from Ukraine and repeatedly push Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky to investigate former Vice President Joe Biden's son, Hunter Biden, then there might not be any other way around it. "We may very well have crossed the Rubicon," he said.

Schiff contends that the allegations represent "the most profound violation of the presidential oath" and that no privilege can cover corruption. As to whether it's true or not, Schiff argued that the president could just release the transcript of his call with Zelensky if there was nothing unsavory about it. "Clearly, he's afraid for the public to see," Schiff told Tapper. In other words, something stinks. Tim O'Donnell

Iran's leaders already gave their two cents on the rising tensions between Tehran and the United States on Sunday. Tuns out, some folks in Washington who have had some experience dealing with Iran also had some things to say.

Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, appearing on CBS' Face the Nation, once again accused Iran of orchestrating the strikes against Saudi oil facilities last week, while repeating that he considers it "a state-on-state act of war." When host Margaret Brennan mentioned that Iranian Foreign Minister Mohammad Javad Zarif denies the allegations, Pompeo was not overly friendly to his counterpart, saying "it's beneath the dignity of anyone to listen to" him. But Pompeo did maintain he's looking for a diplomatic solution.

Former Secretary of State John Kerry and former Defense Secretary James Mattis shared some sentiments with Pompeo. In an appearance on ABC's This Week, Mattis said Tehran is doing what it's always done — "trying to craft a foreign policy that pushes others around." Mattis added that the U.S. needs to urge its allies to stand with Washington to prevent Tehran from destabilizing the Middle East.

Kerry, who helped foster the 2015 nuclear pact with Iran, also appeared on Face the Nation where he preached restraint when it came to dealing with Tehran and even praised President Trump for doing just that. But he did say that he thinks Iran was "one way or the other" behind the oil facilities attacks and that "our allies" who still support the 2015 agreement also "support holding Iran accountable for other issues in the region." Tim O'Donnell