"I've got good news and I've got bad news — the bad news is I lied about the good news, and both bads combine to be the worst news: Bill Cosby has been released from prison after his sexual assault conviction was overturned," Stephen Colbert said on Wednesday's Late Show. The audience booed, and Colbert said he agreed with them — "or to put that another way, me too." Cosby wasn't exonerated, he's "getting off on a technicality" stemming from a 2005 agreement Cosby signed with the prosecutor at the time, Bruce Castor, he added. "Now, if the name Bruce Castor rings a bell, it's because he's the same paragon of legal ethics who went on to represent the former president during his second Senate impeachment trial. His business card just says 'Bruce Castor: Actual Devil's Advocate.'"
"In other news, the country is as hot as hell — so at least Cosby has a preview of the afterlife," Colbert joked darkly. After talking about the weather, he turned to politics. "It's the last day of June 2021, so naturally everyone's focused on the 2024 presidential election," he grimaced. Sen. Tom Cotton's Iowa pushups were overshadowed by South Dakota Gov. Kristi Noem's National Guard deployment to the southern border — and no, not the one with Nebraska. "The strangest and most unconstitutional part of this story is that Noem is paying for the deployment with a 'private donation'" from a GOP mega-donor in Tennessee, Willis Johnson, Colbert said. "For the money, the donor got a private army and a 'This American Junta' tote bag."
Speaking of elections, New York City voted for a new mayor last week — and its Board of Elections absolutely shanked the results on Tuesday, The Late Show noted.
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The Daily Show's Desi Lydic apologized on behalf of the NYC Board of Elections, with appropriate grace and technical savvy. You can watch that ballot-box fire below.
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