Binge drinking ‘makes men more attractive to women’

A new study has claimed that men use binge drinking as a “sexual signal” to show women their robustness. Scientists say that heavy drinking among young men shows their “willingness to take risks,” thereby making them more attractive as sexual prospects.

In crashing news for tee-totallers, the report found that: “Occasional drinkers and frequent drinkers were rated as significantly more attractive than nondrinkers, especially in short-term mating contexts.”

Bank robber gives 20-hour statement in court

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A judge in Germany said she regretted not interrupting the “excessive digressions” of a bank robber who embarked on a 20-hour-long statement in court. During his epic monologue, Michael Jauernik said he was “more intelligent and clever than any employee of the criminal police agency” and bragged about his fitness regime, which included situps three times each day. None of this saved him – he was sentenced to 12-and-a-half years in prison for three bank robberies.

China cops investigate flying fish incident

Police in China are investigating a case of “flying fish” after a video has emerged capturing it smashing the windscreen of a car. A car owner called the cops after finding a large dent and cracks in her windscreen. A dead fish was found nearby and a video subsequently showed a fish bouncing off the car's windscreen and bonnet, instantly smashing it.

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