Speed Reads

Cheers

Heineken's tequila-flavored beer comes to America

Facebook/Desperados

Are you a "spontaneous, adventurous" individual in need of an alcoholic beverage that will deliver maximum "excitement and likability" for your night out on the town? Then look no further, because Heineken has your answer with Desperados, a tequila-flavored, barrel-aged lager the company says combines the refreshment of a beer with the "high-energy and nightlife image usually associated with spirits."

With Americans shying away from beer over the past two decades in favor of other alcoholic drinks, companies have tried to keep pace by introducing potent, sugary brews that straddle the line between beer and spirits. Think Four Loko or Budweiser's Lime-a-Rita. Desperados, which has been sold abroad for years and is entering American markets in the Southeast this week, is Heineken's 5.9 percent ABV offering in that same vein.

So how does Desperados taste? Terrible, say the reviewers at Beer Advocate, who give it a 58 out of 100 and describe it as "very hard to drink" and "cheap lager + lemonade."

"I used to find these highly drinkable," writes one reviewer, "but then I grew facial hair."