The supposed "feud" between Nicki Minaj and Taylor Swift — sparked by Minaj's frustrated comments about her "Anaconda" video failing to garner a Video of the Year nomination at MTV's Video Music Awards — has already been absurdly overblown. But while this is, at best, a conflict that should be hashed out between the two artists, a bunch of people with no connection to either Minaj or Swift have inexplicably thrown themselves into the conversation.
It started last night, Breaking Bad star Aaron Paul plunged into the debate by offering to take Minaj and Swift out for coffee and pancakes:
But as off-key as Paul's (presumably well-intentioned) gesture turned out to be, it's miles ahead of the odious new column from Piers Morgan, which defends Swift by calling Minaj "a stroppy little piece of work." (Your guess is as good as mine.)
Anticipating that his concern-trolling about Nicki Minaj wouldn't be well-received, Morgan announced his column on Twitter with the following preamble:
Unsurprisingly, Morgan hits a series of glib and petty beats: his irritation that Minaj wouldn't leave her dressing room on America's Got Talent to take a picture with his kids, his bafflement that people weren't thrilled when he attempted to hijack a "#blacklivesmatter" hashtag, and a weird admission that he personally prefers voluptuous women.
"Shame on you, Ms Minaj," he closes, because that's the kind of lazy kicker you write when you need to get your tossed-off hot take into the world before everybody moves on.
You can read Morgan's column here. I've ensured he won't get a click for it.