The DEA will now fire employees who organize 'sex parties' with prostitutes

In a groundbreaking decision, the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) has announced it will now begin firing employees who are caught soliciting prostitutes for orgies.

"Solicitation of prostitution on duty or off duty, whether you're in a jurisdiction where it is legal or illegal, first time offense — removal," said Acting DEA Administrator Chuck Rosenberg in a congressional hearing Wednesday.

This decision comes more than a year after the revelation that DEA agents organized "sex parties" — and yes, that is the term used in the Justice Department report exposing this behavior — with prostitutes hired by the Colombian drug cartels they were supposed to be shutting down. The agents who admitted involvement were punished with suspensions ranging from two to 10 days and later received cash bonuses totaling thousands of dollars.

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Rosenberg said that if DEA agents are again caught in flagrante, with hookers, at orgies, in direct violation of their whole job description, they will now be fired instead of rewarded.