Speed Reads

Late Night Tackles Trump versus Books

Trevor Noah and Seth Meyers pick favorite parts of John Bolton's Trump tell-all. Bolton isn't one of them.

President Trump "is having a temper tantrum about the Supreme Court," but "his real fury has been reserved" for former National Security Adviser John Bolton, Trevor Noah said on Thursday's Daily Show. Bolton's forthcoming White House tell-all has already revealed some "shady dealings" with several countries, he said, and Trump's Chinese re-election help begging is "not just corrupt — it's also really embarrassing. Because Bolton's book makes Trump sound less like a president and more like a crackhead who's out of cash."

"Just from the excerpts that we've seen, John Bolton's book has painted Trump as corrupt, dumb, and amoral, but my favorite thing that has come out of this book so far also shows us that Trump is, like, really weird," Noah said. "Can you imagine being Kim Jong Un, and then getting a signed CD from Elton John, but it's signed by Donald Trump? I mean, that's like getting an autographed Michael Jordan jersey but it's signed by Donald Trump! There's no way to make it more of a joke! This is the joke! He's ruined jokes. It's also weird that Trump thinks Kim Jong Un listens to CDs. Dude, he's the president of North Korea! The man listens to cassettes."

"Now Remember, John Bolton's not some lefty hero of the resistance," Noah noted. "He's as Republican as an assault rifle giving a lecture on trickle-down economics." Still, "whatever is in this book," he promised Trump, it "will in no way change our opinion of you."

"Every tell-all Trump book confirms again and again how uniquely cretinous our president is — and they're all equally, well, pointless," Late Night's Seth Meyers said, These "tell-all books" on Trump "would only be interesting if behind closed doors he was eloquent and curious and not racist."

Bolton's version mostly "proves how loathsome and duplicitous its author is," Meyers said. "Bolton has been a key figure in some of the biggest disasters of the last 20 years," and "now, rather than answer the call when his country needed him, he's cashing in with a $2 million book deal. And in that way, he's exactly like Trump and all the other ghouls in the modern Republican Party. He burned everything down, stuffed his hands in the till, grabbed as much cash as he could, and left everyone else to clean up the mess." Watch below. Peter Weber