"The results of the 2020 Census just came out, and for the first time in American history the number of white people went down," Jimmy Fallon said on Thursday's Tonight Show, surprised at the cheers from his audience. "Most people shrugged at the decline of white people, while Fox News declared it a national emergency."
"Here in L.A., they may start making people show proof they've been vaxxed to enter public indoor spaces," Silverman said. "If getting vaccinated lets me go to a bar or a gym in L.A., that is a small price to pay to hang out with some of the worst people alive." Seriously, she deadpanned, "what's next with this stuff, you know? Before kids can go to school they'll have to get a shot for polio and dyptheria, tetanus, measles, mumps, rubella, chicken pox, hepatitis B — oh wait, they already do that."
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"The Delta variant has caused a huge COVID spike, not that every region of the United States has been affected equally," Stephen Colbert said at The Late Show. "Cases are going up gradually in the Northeast, Midwest, and West — but the South, oh, she will rise again. The problem is — you guessed it — in the South, fewer people are vaccinated on average. You can read all about it in the classic Southern novel To Kill a Mockingbird By Giving It Medical Advice From Facebook."
Colbert played Arnold Schwarzenegger's rant against "schmucks" who won't wear masks or get vaccinated, then sided with President Biden in his spat with Ron DeSantis, the governor of Florida, "which accounts for nearly 1 in 5 U.S. COVID cases — also, 1 in 5 spring break chlamydia cases." And "speaking of the addled ramblings of a diseased brain," he said, "there's some news about MyPillow CEO Mike Lindell" and newly minted "video birthday clown" Rudy Giuliani.
On Late Night, Seth Meyers took a closer look at the news about Lindell, Giuliani, and other "Trump-adjacent weirdos."
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How Mike Johnson is rendering the House ‘irrelevant’Talking Points Speaker has put the House on indefinite hiatus
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Dutch center-left rises in election as far-right fallsSpeed Read The country’s other parties have ruled against forming a coalition
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Gaza ceasefire teeters as Netanyahu orders strikesSpeed Read Israel accused Hamas of firing on Israeli troops
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Argentina’s Milei buoyed by regional election winsSpeed Read Argentine President Javier Milei is an ally of President Trump, receiving billions of dollars in backing from his administration
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Proposed Trump-Putin talks in Budapest on holdSpeed Read Trump apparently has no concrete plans to meet with Putin for Ukraine peace talks
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Bolivia elects centrist over far-right presidential rivalSpeed Read Relative political unknown Rodrigo Paz, a centrist senator, was elected president
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Madagascar president in hiding, refuses to resignSpeed Read Andry Rajoelina fled the country amid Gen Z protests and unrest
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Sanae Takaichi: Japan’s Iron Lady set to be the country’s first woman prime ministerIn the Spotlight Takaichi is a member of Japan’s conservative, nationalist Liberal Democratic Party
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Israel, Hamas agree to first step of Trump peace planSpeed Read Israel’s military pulls back in Gaza amid prisoner exchange
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Israel intercepts 2nd Gaza aid flotilla in a weekSpeed Read The Israeli military intercepted a flotilla of nine boats with 145 activists aboard along with medical and food aid
