Johnny Rotten bitten on penis by flea after befriending squirrels

Former Sex Pistols lead singer John Lydon has revealed he was bitten on his penis by a flea after he rescued some squirrels. The 64-year-old, also known as Johnny Rotten, says he has flea bites in several parts of his body after he befriended the squirrels who were hanging around his house in Venice Beach, Los Angeles. “The bites, wow, last night was murder because of it,” he said. “The itching too. It’s such a poxy thing to get caught out on.”

Couple with 53-year age gap open OnlyFans account

A 23-year-old man and his 76-year-old wife have opened an OnlyFans account to share saucy content with paying punters. Almeda and Gary Hardwick, from Tennessee, married two weeks after meeting at her son Robert’s funeral. Gary was aged 17 at the time and had just emerged from a relationship with a 77-year-old. He describes Almeda as “a wonderful lover” and promises “fully explicit content” on their OnlyFans account.

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Massive penis disappears in Germany

German police are investigating after a seven-foot wooden sculpture of a penis vanished from a mountainside where it appeared without explanation several years ago. The immense phallus seems to have been chopped down over the weekend, leaving behind only a pile of sawdust on the Grünten mountain, in southern Bavaria.

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