The news that Ebola has arrived in America is unsettling, but health experts say the chance of a serious outbreak in the U.S. is close to zero. Somebody should tell that to the panic-stricken news media, Jon Stewart said on Wednesday night's Daily Show. "They've drunk so much doomsday juice, they're even projecting panic onto people who are not panicking," he said. "It's almost like they're crossing their fingers for an outbreak." So what's going on?
"The problem is, the media was infected with Ebola fear a long time ago, and now that it's had its time to incubate, they're showing extreme symptoms," Dr. Stewart diagnosed. "Keep in mind, they already have a weakened immunity to any sort of panic." He's certainly right about this: It is much less frightening to hear the head of the CDC discuss Ebola with "Don't Worry, Be Happy" playing in the background. --Peter Weber