Republican says Jesus didn’t have enough rifles to save his life

A Republican congresswoman has said Jesus didn’t have enough AR-15s to prevent crucifixion. “The little Twitter trolls, they like to say, ‘Ah Jesus didn’t need an AR-15! How many AR-15s do you think Jesus woulda had?’” said Lauren Boebert said during a Family Camp Meeting at the Charis Christian Center in Colorado Springs. “Well, he didn’t have enough to keep his government from killing him,” she added. Boebert owns a gun-themed restaurant called Shooters.

Peers ‘horrified’ by Stoke relocation suggestion

“Horrified peers” have reacted badly to Michael Gove’s suggestion that they should move to Stoke-on-Trent, insisting that if they were forced to move, MPs should come with them. As the proposal went down badly, Lord Young of Cookham, a former Conservative cabinet minister, argued that “sauce for the ermined goose is surely sauce for the plebian gander”. Earlier, Gove, the levelling up secretary, said he would “wholeheartedly welcome the relocation of the House of Lords to Stoke.

Barrister fined for being rude to judge

A barrister has been suspended and fined £2,000 after she told a judge “don’t try to make me sound like an idiot”. A disciplinary hearing was told that Jacqueline Vallejo was “rude and unprofessional” to the female judge during a crown court trial. The hearing was told that during the trial, held at Snaresbrook Crown Court in 2016, Vallejo was “abrupt, disrespectful” and had an “unhelpful tone, attitude and approach”.