Late Night tackles the Trump-Biden transition
President-elect Joe Biden ended up winning 306 electoral votes to outgoing President Trump's 232, the exact reverse of Trump's 2016 victory, Trevor Noah said on Monday's Daily Show. "Which basically means that Trump is the Hillary Clinton of this election. 'Lock me up! Lock me up!'" But instead of accepting his loss, Trump is "just sitting at home trying to manifest a win on Twitter" while he loses in court, he said. "It's almost like a miracle. You know, he took one election loss and turned it into 1,000 more losses."
"Trump tweeted last night, 'I WON THE ELECTION!'" Seth Meyers noted at Late Night, "Buddy, you're still talking about that? That was four years ago. Also, we had another election and I have terrible news." Twitter added a "very passive-aggressive" label on the tweet, he added. "Next it's just gonna be, 'Aww, bless his heart.'"
"Even though Trump's lawsuits keep getting tossed out, it's clear the president's not planning to concede anytime soon," Jimmy Fallon said at The Tonight Show. "So you know what? We thought we'd do it for him and give us the concession speech that we all deserve." He stitched together a genuinely fine speech.
"I feel like he may be coming around," because this morning Trump tweeted again that he won — but in lower-case, Jimmy Kimmel said at Kimmel Live. "That's as close as he's gonna get to a concession speech. It's like a kid slowly realizing that nobody's coming to his birthday party." He "identified the Trump Stages of Grief, in 10 parts," and had kids recite some terrible lessons they could have actually learned from this president.
"As the parent of three young children, I can assure you we've still got like six more stages of tantrum before he finally gets put down for bed," James Corden joked at The Late Late Show. About 10,000 Trump supporters who also don't accept his loss gathered in Washington on Saturday, though Trump's press secretary claimed it was a million, he noted. "I mean, if this is how his aides do math, it's no wonder Trump thinks he won the election."
"So the administration ends as it began — lying about crowd size," Stephen Colbert sighed at The Late Show. After tweeting that Biden "won," Trump "declared backsies, tweeting 'I WON THE ELECTION!'" he added. "That is the digital equivalent of waking up to find Grandpa screaming on the lawn in his underwear." Watch below. Peter Weber