The Week contest: Adult pacifier

This week's question: Adult pacifiers are becoming popular in China as a stress reliever, with some online stores saying they're selling more than 2,000 each month. In seven words or fewer, come up with an advertising slogan that a U.S. manufacturer could use to sell anxious American adults on the benefits of a binky.
Click here to see the results of last week's contest: Maggot meals
RESULTS:
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THE WINNER: "When life sucks, suck back"
Gary Greene, Greenfield, Massachusetts
SECOND PLACE: "Grown‑up worries, toddler solutions"
Geno Recupero, Palm Desert, California
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THIRD PLACE: "Plug in, chill out."
Jonas Cox, Amherst, Massachusetts
HONORABLE MENTIONS:
"You've come a long way...baby?"
Paul Kim, Orono, Maine
"Suck it up AND be a man."
Laurel Rose, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
"It worked once. Why not now?"
Kenneth Walker, Bridgeport, Ohio
"The adult binky for those who overthinky"
Rebecca Burgan, Grass Valley, California
"The suck stops here"
Nicole Nehama Auerbach, Chicago, Illinois
"You're allowed to suck at this!"
John Laclede, Round Hill, Virginia
"Why not? Everything else sucks!"
Gary Evenson, McFarland, Wisconsin
"Have a binkie, not a drinkie"
Lee Acors, Chesapeake, Virginia
"No stiff upper lip required"
Ken Kellam III, Dallas, Texas
"Brings back pleasant mammaries"
Don Onnen, Tolland, Connecticut
"Binkies, better than Twinkies"
Diane Ross, Hatfield, Pennsylvania
"You suck anyway, so go with it."
Al Stoffel, San Diego, California
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